Today is Thanksgiving here in the United States. People all over will be cooking, eating, watching football, doing LOTS of drinking. Then the really crazy ones will wake up early tomorrow morning to get the good ‘Black Friday’ deals.
I’m not exactly sure when I began to despise the holidays. Probably after a few years of celebrating with my in-laws, honestly. No fault of theirs though.
Holidays are super stressful to me for some reason, and I don’t even have a lot to. Furthermore, I always feel so bad hating on them because I know I’m so lucky to have family to celebrate with.
This year is extra hard due to circumstances out of our control. So much that I told hubby a few weeks ago that I would not be going to his family’s Thanksgiving or Christmas.
I didn’t make this decision lightly. All of the spiritual literature I’ve been reading, and that has helped me level up in life, goes against what I’m doing today. But I’m doing it anyway, because these boundaries are necessary for me at the moment.
I won’t apologize for it.
The week leading up to today has been sketchy. My ego really really wants me to be pissed about today.
All week I’ve been shutting it up when it says things like, “It’s not fair you have to spend Thanksgiving alone.” Or, “You should be angry with hubby for not skipping it with you.”
I’m so happy to know about the ego and it’s big wish to sabotage every bit of happiness in my life!
I didn’t know how I’d really feel come today. Would I be remorseful? Angry? Sad to be alone and not stuffing my face?
I thought I might go over to the in-laws after my sister in law leaves, but today is panning out way better than I expected, so I probably won’t. (They live right behind us, a big reason why I wouldn’t expect hubby to skip it when we don’t have anything going on).
It’s just after 1:00 now and the family is getting ready to go.
I am feeling a sense of peace and calmness I’ve never felt on a holiday.
This morning I adopted a turkey named Jackie. I feel happy knowing that on ‘Dead Bird Day’ I at least saved one. This will be an annual tradition!
I was leery about spending today alone, so I invited my dead relatives.
My mom, my grandma Jackie, grandpa Bill & my other grandpa.
It’s kind of nice because I don’t even have to feed them
And my grandma & mom always LOVED doing dishes. I’m going to tell them they can do all mine.
This is going to be a very spiritual day for me, and I am really looking forward to it.