Life is a Sham (I guess)


Day #517

Despite being in the midst of a 2020 shit show, life is so good.

This was the most unique and wonderful summer ever. I say wonderful because one of these times when I say it, I’m actually going to believe it.

I am getting good at managing my worries, and I’ve had A LOT.

My Pets: OMG, 2020 has been the year of sitting in the veterinarian parking lot while my ill pets get seen (still can’t go inside with them).

Milo has had two puncture wounds, a tooth problem, a dental and two teeth removed. It took him about a month to recover after his dental and I babied him every step of the way. I never wanted to go up north, I was so worried about him for a couple of weeks there. He is 10 and suddenly looked like a 20 year old cat with a super thin face. Now he is back to normal, and I’m so relieved. One day he was sitting next to me on the bench outside and I thought about him being gone and I started to cry. I’m not ready for that, but I know I never will be.

Jules has had an ear infection for months. I wonder if Vetselect has an award for the pet with the most positive ear cytologies at the end of the year? There’s a new medication for yeast and after a couple courses of Oti Max, we tried that. Only, he saw a new vet, and she medicated the wrong ear. The ear meds are put in two weeks apart, so now it’s been a month and he has had both ears treated. He goes in today for a cytology to check. PRAYING it’s negative or they’ll have to send it to a dermatologist for testing. Also, he still has a high liver test. We did every test known to man last summer to find out why (xrays, ultrasound, bloodwork, thyroid check, etc). The new vet (who I’ve never met in person, yet, and I really don’t have a great opinion of her because he’s always had a bad left ear, yet she medicated the right…) told me that if it’s still high in a month we should do another ultrasound to be sure. He has allergies bad too and is on a really expensive pill. I want to allergy test him (which will total $1000 including allergy injections for several weeks) but waiting to get everything else under control first– which doesn’t seem to ever be happening.

UPDATE: Vet visit was okay. New doctor was way behind so he got to see my old friend, Dr. Jones, who is the best vet there. Left ear was so inflamed she couldn’t get her ear scope in . She put him on Prednisone & allergy tested him. (his ear infections are largely due to his allergies). I want to brag on him for a minute. Throughout this all he remains so loyal to me. He was so anxious at the vet because we had to wait by the car forever but when we got home his eyes were on me while I was working even though I knew he had to have been in a good amount of pain. I look back at this picture from Sunday:

He has held his left ear down like that all summer, poor thing– I sure hope allergy treatments help. I don’t want my loyal buddy to suffer anymore. Thoughts & prayers are appreciated

My Job: I’ve written enough about this lately. I have no idea what is about to happen over the next several weeks/months, which is hard for my usual ancy self. I’ve given it all up. I know that any day now I could be laid off or moved to another school or the self-contained EI room. While it’s easy to say I’ve given it up, it still gets to me sometimes. Getting used to it though.

My House: Our house is filled with negative energy and is constantly breaking. We’ve had SO many things go wrong just since spring and even the stuff we fix still has issues. We spent a ton of money waterproofing the basement, but it still leaks. The system they put in works fine, but the cinder blocks are still filling up with water when it pours really hard. That is the theme and I’m starting to wonder if we have negative energy. I did sage the house about a month ago and maybe should again. Does anyone know how to get demons or negative spirits out of the house?

My Kids/School: Most everyone in our area is doing virtual only school. My kids’ district has a hybrid option where they can go in person 2 days per week. All of them chose the hybrid vs. all online and now I’m seeing SUPER crowded hallways at other schools posted on social media and now I’m second guessing letting them go back at all. I think it’s too late to switch them all, so that worries me too.

The election and political shit is always a worry, but I’m not getting into that.

WHEW.. I intended on writing a positive post, I’m not sure why I just wrote all that stuff but maybe now it’ll be more out of my head.

But other than all that, life is good. Family is hard, like really really difficult, but I’m managing and continue to learn about setting boundaries and keeping myself sane when I have to spend time with them- so that is good.

I’m not ready for summer to end, but I AM ready for 2021 to begin! Sorry, not sorry 2020!!

I did get some exciting news yesterday. Our Milky Chance concert got rescheduled for the 3rd time to May 3rd 2021. We were originally supposed to go down to Kentucky in May 2020, but then it got rescheduled to October 29th. I was worried they would just cancel so I’m SOOOOO excited for May. On Sunday, they played outdoors in Germany and I had a livestream tix. They were SOOOOO good! (I’ve seen them in person twice, they are just amazing live, I wasn’t sure that would transfer digitally). Now I’m so pumped for the concert and I’m bringing my niece, son and nephew (who will be 17, 18 and 17) and it’s a local show at a super small venue. My niece loves them and has never seen them. We are in general admission and we are making our way up to the stage- she is going to think she died and went to heaven!

Anyways, that’s all. It’s Tuesday and I haven’t worked on the novels yet this week. I’m going to try to get a bit done before the vet appointment. It’s hard to concentrate now and I’m losing the excitement of the story. I have to make sure to keep plugging away when school starts.



Published by Organic Revival

I am a mom of boys, wife, furmom, gardner, walker, runner, teacher, reader, writer and cook. I am 42 years old and live in the beautiful state of Michigan. I love my job as an elementary special education teacher. The most remarkable quality of mine is that I'm a recovering alcoholic.

2 thoughts on “Life is a Sham (I guess)

    1. Hella Moone – I am a mom of boys, wife, furmom, gardner, walker, runner, teacher, reader, writer and cook. I am 42 years old and live in the beautiful state of Michigan. I love my job as an elementary special education teacher. The most remarkable quality of mine is that I'm a recovering alcoholic.
      Organic Revival says:

      They sure are! I love my space but sometimes want to sell everything and downsize to a tiny apartment. Thank you for the good luck! I’m happy that I’m a special education teacher and hoping to do most of my work with kids in person.

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