It is Saturday morning and I’m feeling a bit sick and sore, but mentally well.
I think I’m coming down with something. I’ve had a scratchy throat and hot/cold spells the past couple of days, although I felt good enough yesterday to go on a 3 mile speed walk/jog. It was a great workout and the weather was perfect (like 45 F in mid December– oh yeah!!). Although I was bummed because I thought I’d sleep like a baby but had a really hard time falling asleep. The night before I walked 2 miles after work and fell fast asleep at 9:30pm, it was fabulous!
Let’s recap the past week:
Prior to Monday- drank every night. Stopped after Sunday night.
Monday– Foot was SO sore. Had to do a lot of extra walking and driving and it made for an even more miserable day. On 20 mg of pred per day. Sat a lot after work, doing the least amount of work needed. Very low quality day.
Tuesday– Foot was feeling a little better. I got new bedding delivered and had enough stamina to wash it all and redo my bed. I also went on a 1 mile walk, but my foot was hurting towards the end and after the walk. On 20 mg of pred still.
Wednesday– Foot felt worse, I think due to the walk Tuesday night. I had a class and it was a long/hard walk in. During break my friends went for coffee, but I opted to stay behind because I didn’t want to walk down the long hallway to the coffee. On 20 mg pred.
Thursday– MUCH better. Better day at work overall, not purposely staying off my foot and being able to walk wherever/whenever. Lowered pred to 10 mg per day. Took a 2 mile walk after work without much pain. Progress!
Friday– Woke up and foot still felt pretty good (small amount of pain, but not to where it limits my mobility). Had a productive day at work. Speed walked/ran 3 miles after work with little pain. Still on 10 mg pred.
Today is day 6 without alcohol and I think if my foot continues on this path, then it’s safe to say that alcohol greatly contributes to the gout occurring in my foot. This is a blessing. I. Can’t. Drink. If I do, I will be in serious pain and unable to get around which really SUCKS!! On a side note, after the past few months I will never take my mobility for granted again.
I’m gaining mental and emotional momentum as well as physical. I’ve been meditating and writing a lot this week. That and being outside walking or running, feeds my soul with pure joy and happiness. I wrote on Monday that I want 100 days and I think that I am well on my way. I want more though, I really want a year and then years– until I die. BUT, realistically — it’s one day at a time & that’s what I’ll count on 🤗
Last time I wrote about trouble with the hubs and want to touch on that. He is continuing to be so cranky over small stuff. Last night we were going to play Cribbage and he went downstairs to get a can of lemonade. He had a fit because I had one of my shirts drying on the shelves where we keep our drinks. I look at it as killing two birds with one stone. He looks at it as it’s NOT a clothes drying rack and also said he’s tired of my bras hanging on it. Sorry, but it’s the perfect place to hang my bras and they take up very little room! I don’t want to buy a clothing rack that just takes up space when I rarely use the shelves to dry sweaters (maybe like once a week for 12 hours).
SO.. we talked last night. Work is making him stressed and that is contributing to him blowing up over little things. He got a promotion a couple of months ago and it hasn’t been an easy transition. He was working under a group of directors and now he is more at their level– although they don’t treat him like that. He is taking directives from the CIO but the directors are fighting him every step of the way. He has to talk/persuade grown adults through meetings when they are acting like children. He thinks that as time goes by things will settle down and he will be less stressed (he does like what he is doing in this new role) OR he thinks that one of the directors might try to get rid of him– which is stressful to think about. He unloaded on me last night and I was a good listener (I think). I don’t know how to help him have faith that things will be ok no matter what. Secretly, I’m terrified that work stress will cause him to have a mental breakdown and kill himself or our entire family (OK, I know that sounds extreme, but it’s happened before. A few years ago, our PTA president’s husband hung himself– right in the trees in the neighborhood– this shit is real and really happens). But, do you know what makes everything better? A good long hard bike ride. With temps in the 40’s today and tomorrow we will go and hopefully that’ll help him feel happy and at ease– at least in the moment.
That’s it for my Saturday update. I’m looking forward to a productive and relaxing weekend. Peace and love <3