My spirits were up yesterday and it seems as though (at least for now) I am out of that funk! Perhaps it was just a grouchy mood on Monday recovering from the crazy & somewhat annoying weekend.
After I wrote, I meditated, took the dog for a walk and then did a short running workout on the treadmill. I took time after running to do some leg lifts– working different muscle groups. I showered and then called my dad, prepared to head to my grandma’s with both kids to visit. Because of my uncle’s birthday on Thursday, my dad switched his days and was not at my grandma’s– SO there wasn’t a great reason for me to go (THANK YOU UNIVERSE!!).
The kids and I needed to eat, and my lunch stash is meager so we headed out and had lunch at Olga’s. Afterwards, we went looking for a desk for my youngest’s room and got a few groceries.
It was an easy evening, leftovers for dinner so I didn’t need to cook. The kids did their chores and picked up the house.
When hubby got home, we ate and then ran up to Performance Bicycle to see if they had the bike he wanted for his birthday (his bike sucks, he has been riding our oldest’s when we go on rides). When we were coming home I thought I spotted a fox in the next door neighbor’s yard during the split second that we drove by. I walked to the back of our yard when we got home, not really expecting to see anything. I was pleasantly surprised!
After watching the fox until it noticed me and ran away (there was actually 2, so we think they have a den really close and babies), we went for a 12 mile bike ride. I hadn’t ridden my bike for several days and that probably contributed to my funk.
We didn’t get home until after 9:30 and the ride was cool and exhilarating– exactly what I needed.
My mood over the course of the day was happy and light. MUCH better from the pissiness I felt on Monday, and sporadically since Friday.
I don’t like feeling taken advantage of and was put in a situation last week that made me feel like this. I had a (high maintenance) mom ask when my oldest could “hang out” with her son. I told her that Wednesday or Thursday of this week would be good and was curious about “where” they would hang out. The kid isn’t always the easiest kid (he is the emotionally impaired kid from scouts) but what is worse is his parents who are super anal, let him call all shots, beckon to his call and whim and are just downright anxious and annoying. USUALLY when the parents call to set up a play day (or hang out session, now that they’re teenagers), they want to do it at our house (it’s easier for them). Well this time she didn’t even ask where– she just asked if she could drop her kid off at 11. OK– at our house it is!!
It probably wouldn’t have bothered me as much if I didn’t have to deal with him and his dad over the weekend. They can be difficult to be with. The way they argue back and forth and the way this kid behaves for his parents sometime is downright appalling.
I need to learn how to say no and set limits. I set up this hang out session because we will be up north next week, the following week my dad is having surgery and the week after that is scout camp. So REALLY this was the best time to squeeze it in. And as frustrating as it is for the mom to just expect me to host, it really overall is easier for me. So I sucked it up– but think it definitely contributed to my pissiness.
Another factor that I believe has contributed to my funk is my health– and the fact that my dad is having surgery on his heart in a couple weeks.
My dad has had afib for over a year now. He’s had his heart shocked back into rhythm several times— which always worked well short term. Afib is awful and he really doesn’t know how he is going to feel day-to-day and moment-to-moment. He is going in on July 9th to have an ablation done on his heart. Basically they cauterize the damaged parts (which they won’t know how extensive the damage is until they get in there). It’s an 8 hour procedure and pretty much freaking me out. I lost my mom in July after a surgical procedure. I’m also scared that he will go through this and it won’t be effective. I think I have a pretty good mindset about it though. I am SO GRATEFUL that he has something that CAN be fixed, and not terminal cancer with a short life expectancy. I’m also putting 100% faith into God and asking him to watch over my dad during this time. BUT I would be lying if I said that it wasn’t in the back of my mind pretty much all of the time.
I had a wellness checkup last week. It went pretty well, but I had my doctor follow up on my anemic blood work results (for over a year now, the blood work results from my rheumatologist always comes back as anemic and she always tells me to follow up with my doctor– which I never do– until now). I figured I just needed to be more consistent with taking my iron supplement and probably needed to be better about getting more iron in my diet.
Well, she wants me to see a hematologist and said I might have a “bone marrow” problem. Not sure exactly what that means, but the mere thought of checking my bone marrow makes me sick to my stomach (I mean, they have to go through the bone to get to it..).
So that’s been a bit of a stressor and I’m not sure why but since that visit I have been completely exhausted, requiring at least 8 hours of sleep plus a daily 30 minute afternoon nap. Now I was anemic, working full time and getting up at 5 am to workout several times per week and survived without this exhaustion. The only thing I can figure is that this “problem” has gotten into my head and it’s more of a mental thing. My appointment with the hematologist isn’t until July 10th– the day after my dad’s surgery. That is going to be one fun week!
Ok.. all that yuckiness unloaded feels pretty good. Today isn’t going to be a ton of fun. It is raining and supposed to rain all day. The teen’s naughty friend is getting dropped off in a couple hours. Later I have to take both boys to get their physical for camp. Fun fun fun!
Tomorrow, Friday and the weekend will be good. HOT and sunny, I plan to bike ride, swim and read while floating in the pool. We are going up north next week to celebrate the 4th. It will be fun and festive and nice to hang out with my dad up there.
That’s all I’ve got! I’m so glad I unloaded 🙂
Peace Out <3