Purging Causes of Anxiety, Social Media

Today is Sunday and Day 5 AF for me.  It’s been a great sober weekend.   Hubby and teenager were camping Friday night until this morning.  My other son was with his uncle all day yesterday on a trip to Greenfield Village.

Saturday was a great day filled with some really strange occurrences.  First of all, Jules had a vet appointment in the morning.  The boys took the Escape camping, so I had to squeeze him into the backseat of the Mustang. It was fine, until some crazy person passed me on the right and then slammed on his breaks, losing control and then driving off going the other way.  I had to slam on my breaks to avoid hitting him and Jules flew into the front seat.

There were some really odd conversations that day, at the vet regarding a woman who had a racist dog (who hates only white dogs) and at Sam’s Club with the checkout guy joking about having to watch to make sure the nuns didn’t sneak out with any unpaid items.

It was just a wonderful, rosey lovin’ life type day!  After taking Jules to the vet, grocery shopping and cleaning up the house a bit, I read my book while floating in the pool.  We are having a heat wave (Indian Summer) in Michigan and I actually got into the water and swam (rare for me).  William got home around 6pm.  I made dinner, then delicious loaf of banana bread, we ate and cleaned up.  Then I was bored.  While the thought of drinking crossed my mind Friday night and Saturday throughout the day, I was wise to my inner alcoholic Betsy, and was going to stand my ground.

I am so glad I did, I got some GREAT sleep Friday and Saturday night and I am confident that not drinking contributed 100% to my rosey & energetic weekend.  The most dangerous time was Saturday night when I had nothing to do.  It was ok though, I rented a chick flick and found a website that I could write an email to myself and have it sent at a future date.  I will receive it on my 50th birthday!

One thing I want to bring up in this cheery entry is the entity of social media.   For awhile now, I’ve been obsessed, addicted to Facebook.  I check it constantly.  Many things that I see on there make me feel bad in one way or another.  Whether it’s family who is having fun and not including me, or political rants, or just general whininess from people who are so negative, it was overwhelming to me.  I decided last Monday (about a week ago) to temporarily deactivate my account.  I thought I’d try to last a week, just to give myself a break.

I can’t describe how this has affected me in a positive way.  For awhile now, I’ve felt so overwhelmed by social media, the connectivity and technology in general.  I often wish that we could go back to the ’80’s, when you had to actually talk to someone face to face, call them or write a letter to communicate.  It feels like for a long time I was on a merry-go-round that was going faster and faster.  I finally feel like I jumped off the merry-go-round and that life has slowed down.  My facebook addiction is like my alcohol addiction and I have to take it one moment at a time.  I am so happy off it right now, but am not going to look far ahead.

I’m not sure if staying off social media impacted my sobriety in a positive way, but it sure has made me feel happier inside.

That’s all I have to write about today.  I am grateful for my abstinence and ready to tackle this work week bright eyed and bushy tailed.  Club soda cheers to a relaxing Sunday floating in the pool and being fully present on this beautiful Indian Summer day <3

Published by Organic Revival

I am a mom of boys, wife, furmom, gardner, walker, runner, teacher, reader, writer and cook. I am 42 years old and live in the beautiful state of Michigan. I love my job as an elementary special education teacher. The most remarkable quality of mine is that I'm a recovering alcoholic.

6 thoughts on “Purging Causes of Anxiety, Social Media

  1. The only reason I have fb is to share my blog posts–don’t go on otherwise!! After the election I timed out for a while and it was the best feeling. Now keeping it to the bare minimum def feels like the healthiest way to go. It doesn’t matter if what I’m looking at is positive or negative, I never leave that app better than when I opened it. That’s a sign for me! Way to go on Day 5 Zoe. x

    1. Thanks Cat 🙂
      I wish I could use FB for my blog but too many work people.
      Maybe I should delete & start over. Being away from it feels awfully refreshing though 😊😊🌈

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